Birthdays, Menopause & Merry-Making

Hello 2024!

It's a few days short of my birthday (yay), and I am turning 46 and appreciate being here and being alive. This year, amidst the whirlwind of shifts and transitions, I find myself taking stock and embracing my journey of self-discovery and acceptance that comes with being in my forties.

This particular year has different quality and energy to it as health revelations finally come my way after years of questioning. For one, I lost my hair due to alopecia - it was so dramatic and while I am now totally loving my bald look, the grieving and loss is real. Power to those folks struggling with hair loss and reinveting themselves in ways filled with self-compasssion. One of the most ridiculous things people come up to me to say about my bald head is.. ‘ You are so bold to cut all your hair...’ or ‘I could never pull off the bald look’ or worse still ‘ You have the for head it, it would not suit me..’ My piece of advise if you are trying to connect and be nice as you come across someone with a bald head and you have lots of unsolicited ideas, opinions and thoughts, keep them to yourself. 

Dawn selfcare and general mischief

 This year I was also diagnosed with early menopause and after consideration placed on hormone replacement therapy. I remain hopeful for a journey to maintain my heart and mental health and to accept what I irreversibly lost in terms of bone density and keep finding ways to keep strong and moving. As you can imagine, it has been a roller coaster six year journey to finally get here. I was given the run around by doctors. So one hip replacement later and another one disintegrating as we speak, I needed to find answers around the root cause of my dis-ease. And so I feel compelled to share my experience to encourage other women in their late 30s and beyond to really champion for their health and well-being and demand for the necessary care and support to ease into navigating perimenopause, menopause, and post-menopause. These are normal and vital stages of life but are often shrouded in silence, shame, and stigma. We all face them uniquely and any interventions must be tailored to your needs.

I have a great personal trainer & routine in Kenol

It is an incredibly important element to bring to light because it extends well beyond reproductive health. The impact of hormonal changes extends to heart health, bone health, and mental well-being. This information helps so many women focus on ways to prepare for the next phase of life and adapt to their changing bodies.

Grounding and Resetting

I cannot reiterate the importance of more women receiving the necessary support and information to lead fulfilling lives during this phase of life.

These conversations need to be normalised, and we should not tolerate body shaming or the invalidation of the sometimes intense symptoms and experiences that come during menopause. In a society that often glorifies the unrealistic pursuits of endless youth and vitality completely ignoring the natural cyclic nature of life and regeneration. It is high time we embrace every phase of life and reject feelings of inadequacy. I cant help but wonder if my mother who died at 57 almost quarter of a century ago left us too soon because of a health system and society that fails and discards women who are aging. We cannot continue with this as we move into the future, we must find ways to disrupt the ageist and misogynistic way in which womens health remains neglected and have a new approach so all the girls growing up today have much better health outcomes tomorrow. I would like to thank doctors, nurses and medics to took my pushiness seriously and encourage them to really pay attention to women's health holistically. 

Toko-pa's powerful insights on scarcity mentality deeply resonate with me. In her book "Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home," she defines scarcity as the belief that, no matter the abundance around us, it is never enough. She reminds us that this mindset stems from a sense of unworthiness, causing us to hide parts of ourselves for fear of rejection or hurt. Thankfully, all of us have an antidote to the wound of unworthiness and scarcity that can be applied at any stage of our lives... Afterall, we all have the capacity to heal and restore ourselves and ease our suffering. By healing, I do not mean fixing or curing, but rather returning to wholeness in ways that bolster our body, mind, and spirit.

Dawn energy sun recharging

As I approach this birthday, I hope that my words can offer encouragement to other women to embrace their personal power, nourish their inner strength, and prioritise their well-being. Remember, we were always designed to find ways to heal and returning to wholeness. By discovering inner calm and equinimity, we may better seize opportunities in our orbit and navigate turbulent times with more acceptance, joy, and freedom. 

Life lessons from nature’s beauty