Sikiliza

One lesson I learned early in life as a queer Kenyan woman was the need to choose to self-isolate for self-preservation. While I prefer to live my life quietly and not shout from the rooftops about my identity there are moments like this one needs to stand up to prejudice. I knew from a young age that as private as I am, I wanted to live as authentically as possible and refusing to confine my life and choices within narrow homophobic closets. I figured, life is far too damn short and precious to defend oneself for being different. So selective socialising and sometimes self-isolation seemed like the best way to steer clear of both outright homophobia and the everyday microaggressions that come even from well-meaning colleagues, friends, and family. This is also why many queer folk take seriously the notion of chosen family . Folks would frequently ask why I avoided most family gatherings or friend get-togethers. My mind drifts to the oh so many times we find ourselves in draining, ...

  Alright, let us gather round the fire to pause and warm our hands and thaw our hearts! Now, imagine a tiny seed nestled deep in our earth.  These aren't just any seeds, though, they are  rich with composting told and untold   African powerful stories of resistance.  The seed represents the tiny hope and dreams we care and attend to that offers liberation, healing and justice. We have one tiny seed growing into a mighty forest of feminist strength and resilience.   Generations ago, our feminist ancestors seeded the ground we stand on today. They were visionaries who dared dream of a world where oppressive systems would be dismantled, where collective liberation restoration to wholeness and regeneration of our hearts, bodies, land, and territories as not just lofty ideas but conceivable realities grounded in transformational social justice. Like us, our feminist forebearers encountered challenges, of course. The storm winds of patriarchy, colonisation, neol...

  Every day, I am find myself reflecting on the reality that the journey toward healing and justice is far from straightforward. The struggles endured by our ancestors were immense and complex, yet their unwavering spirit and resilience carved a path for us today. It is because of their relentless determination in the face of adversity that we stand proudly and firmly, embodying the bravery and sacrifices they made. We are not just beneficiaries of their efforts; we are living proof of their courage and the liberation dreams they fought for. Right now the world feels overwhelmed by crisis, leaving many human rights defenders and communities grappling with grief, rage, fear, and despair. It’s crucial to take a moment to reflect on our emotions and seek solace in our connections with one another. While here, let us resist the desire to isolate.  Try not to take too long because we need you. Your beloved, strangers, adversaries alike, including the planet itself needs you to be y...

Hello 2024! It's a few days short of my birthday (yay), and I am turning 46 and appreciate being here and being alive. This year, amidst the whirlwind of shifts and transitions, I find myself taking stock and embracing my journey of self-discovery and acceptance that comes with being in my forties. This particular year has different quality and energy to it as health revelations finally come my way after years of questioning. For one, I lost my hair due to alopecia - it was so dramatic and while I am now totally loving my bald look, the grieving and loss is real. Power to those folks struggling with hair loss and reinveting themselves in ways filled with self-compasssion. One of the most ridiculous things people come up to me to say about my bald head is.. ‘ You are so bold to cut all your hair...’ or ‘I could never pull off the bald look’ or worse still ‘ You have the for head it, it would not suit me..’ My piece of advise if you are trying to connect and be nice as you come acros...

Lately, I’ve been internally busy and rather neglectful in writing, but that doesn’t mean life and its vibrancy around me changed. While I try to make sense of things around going through perimenopause and find my new rhythms, there has been much to be grateful for. I apparently now have a new, updated look with no hair. There is a saying I will make up today… “If you need to cut off all your hair, your head shape will suit a bald look.” Now that I have accepted this state of affairs, I feel better and enough. But more about this and the adventures of hormones in another post. Someone challenged me last December in a coaching session to make this year count. It’s about time for me to visualise and see through some of my dreams and ambitions. When we come into this world, we often get swept up in the dreams and visions of others, so much so that remaining true to our unique sense of purpose gets lost along the way. So here I am deliberately going through the lost and found box and regat...