Sikiliza

self portrait - some Sunday, 2017 I just realised today how immeasurable time is. There is simply never enough time it seems to exhaustively say or do something anything right these days really.... I feel like life has whizzed past and there have been many vivid moments I recall, but on the whole it is hard to imagine my life at the face of four decades ... where did time go? It went like a flash.... As I stop and take a moment to appreciate life; I feel my bare heels sink and dig into the ground a little more firmly now. I am more protective and deeply appreciative of everything around me; the colors, the textures, the moments, the feelings. I say to myself, wow awesome, I wish I could stop and pay more attention to this now that I see how valuable and beautiful life's experience can be. Most times though, there are so many competing pressures nudging or pulling me aside that I quickly snap out of the musing. Some of you may know that I psyche up for night school ...

Going about the rigours of the day I sometimes have a minute to ask, why am I here? And what is the meaning of my life? Reflection, love and melancholy are particularly close companions when I am preoccupied with these thoughts. When faced by deep-seated emotions, my mind often traipses into a series of philosophical questions. And then when I consider the universe; its vast open spaces, wide and limitless. I am fascinated by how inexhaustible it seems. As I weave through this journey we call life, pore through books, listen to stories, immerse myself in learning, appreciate creativity and I realise just how little I know. It is also increasingly apparent to me how trivial I am amid the immeasurable nothingness and everything-else of the cosmos; and if science is to be believed, even when my tiny mind struggles to fathom our galaxy, it is only a speck of dust in the immensity of this universe. I see deeply how truly small I am in the scale of things a...