Sikiliza

self-portrait, 2019 What a year, many highs many lows and so so so many things to be so grateful about. Quite a coincidence that a lot of my pause and reflection moments are at the tail end of the year...I just wanted to share with you some of the musings I have been pondering about...particularly on this radical idea around Love. .. Love needs understanding... cultivating an understanding of oneself.. one’s desires and extending this to our beloved; an ardent pursuit of learning their needs, their passions and easing of their suffering. Love should  bring joy and everyone is worthy of experiencing happiness.   Love  led me to recognise that it is not always the case that one is within reach in day-to-day life with our beloved. Their absence does not ever lessen the immense Love that exists in our hearts.   One of the most difficult things I am still grappling with is the awareness of the deep hurts we rack up inter-generation...

My lover gave me a gift She gave me - her time, A gift she has put in my path without constraints…. She gave me - her hands Her touch heals even the most broken parts of me…. She gave me - her smile That melts through the hardened pained parts of my soul   She gave me - her life, her love, her indulgence In bounty My lover gave me the expansiveness and the patience to let me be to feel enough to be unconstrained and unrestricted by rules, fear, conformities My lovers deep trust in my methods, my ideas, my randomness, my spontaneity, My lover pride of me…her love that erased any shame I bore as baggage My lover who made me feel enough; special, needed My lover who demonstrated to me that love is those small priceless bits My lover, my lover …my love…my life.

Let me look at you, bathed in this morning light I bask in your radiance, it fires my soul... Let me feel your skin, trace fingers so lightly   Escape into your liquid sleepy ebony silk.... Let me hear your voice purr waking up slowly  pleasure waves jolt all my goosebumps   Let me taste you over over and over again I always thirst for you ..fidgety at these delicious thoughts..... Let me soak the scent of you to fill my lungs Coursing inside all of me as I breathe, in a slow smouldering burn   You fire up all my senses my love   So.... reach out your hand out to where I am... As the sun tongue licks our glistening dark skin Feel me waiting warm and ready... I exist for   your   love rays     and   sunshine All we need is for you to lean in   And trace a trail with your kisses on me... Mark me and make me yours Here.. here and here ... then ... breathe.... ...

And the world was whole again thanks to the few and far between Sheroes... Those with a deep sense generosity in their spirits.... Those who give willingly, fully and not expecting back.... Those who are supportive even when they do not fully understand things.... Those who take risks on love, on people or feelings and choose to see the best in others.... Those who surrender to the pleasure of my open arms Those who are terrified of the unfamiliar and unknown emotions coursing through them But gamble their heart and pick YOU anyway...over and over and over again.... Those who are not drowned by disenchantment of lost love and always see the spark of new connections and immerse deeply into it... Those who always round back to ask what you need or want.... And most importantly those who offer nothing more than themselves, their time and presence for the pleasure of another.... Deep kindness is difficult to find because even the most well meaning of us...

The Single Word on my Epitaph....  I do not seek to create a masterpiece or be a renowned lauded wordsmith. But it is on gazing at a night sky like tonight that I cant help but be moved to muster some words to divulge And capture a slice of my feelings as they wash over me  About the miracle that you are... This fondness will likely remain caged, in that mouldy dusted place... forgotten beyond the shadowy whispers reverberating to you through my wishful thinking.... So completely matchless is your gentleness such that when our souls recognised each other many many moons ago, I knew I would be forever altered. Therefore there can be no adequate supply of ways I can describe and celebrate you... But I can stand and bask in the night sky tonight...thinking back and through all the ways you lifted a smile off my face and declare; The universe has felt the strong waves of joy you infused me in me that courses through every cell of my being the...

We get so tangled in those sticky webs   of life’s complexities that we often forget That tiny essential process of asking and acknowledging our innermost desires. We move so fast to get ahead of time;   no pause such that we lose ourselves   And our expunging is complete when everyone else’s needs but ours count. We wade voluminous waves to stay afloat   our mind and bodies bruised and battered   By whims of others and crumbled wishes remain unseen by changeless hearts. We plod on laced with embers of hope   that some day we will recognise ourselves   Amid the bones buried in forgotten-land layered into Mountain Could-Have-Been.

I have been thinking about art, language and expansiveness.  About 4 years ago I decided to put my dreams and ideas into accessories and create a brand around it. At the time, I was simply revamping my collection and in no time I had too many of them. That year they made great gifts at Christmas then my friend asked why I wasn’t selling them. I shrugged.... it does not always come naturally that the things we love can be the things we do and make a living out of. Fast forward to today..... I am so glad that along the way my creativity, design, playfulness and workmanship skills are still growing thanks to a great community and camaraderie of artists, jewellery and accessory designers who swap ideas and skills. The most distinctive thing has been their generosity of spirit, the appreciation of great design, the bottomless pit of creativity that blunts the hard edge of tense competitiveness that capitalism often creates. We work on similar products, targeting sim...

--> A smile A hug A shake A moment Forged a lifetime of friendship Buddies! What precious gifts they are! A blast of fresh air A laugh A spark... A nudge on a dull day Happy funny endearments ..... What a gift comradeship gives! Bless the day  Your soul walked Into this land and crossed my path The world is a better place Because you are in it May your life's path  Only shine bright…with nothing but wonder Here's to celebrating you…

Contemplations and Reclamations - Kenya 2019 Workers are not humans but bodies .... These flesh-filled bodies of laborers have sinewy extensions connected to their humanity; our flames may be dull but still alive with a soldering glow, small but lit nonetheless... Our bodies are invisible and unnecessary unless they building profits and attributions for the supervisor. We work then we die, and new bodies will surely take our place. But what are we but conniving cheeky bodies out to steal a day to ourselves instead of labouring.... It is against policy to be human ... Our bodies are worthy only if we are busy doing their work... Our bodies live to work, not to live..... We are bodies taught to stick to our lanes before we inevitably crash and burn. ...... Next! We lost mum 19 years ago, 7 July 2000, a day I vividly remember, it was a Friday.....It was my first day of a horrible job I continued to endure for 6 years. I reported to work the next day for fea...

Sunrise in Nanyuki 2019 What about the countless songs sung and penned poems... Filled with words and expressions professing our yearnings... The object of these affections dismissive of our longings... Even more, oblivious to those who live to see their smile... A few clam shut fearing messiness of smouldering unchecked passions... Some for some reasons remain hard-hearted and unpleasant to devotion... Yet, many of us have naive optimism of love reciprocated.... So perhaps even in a world full of love words that touch everyone but you.... Maybe there is an unsung song, unreleased poem that will touch you.. So this secret un-lived love may rise be visible and alive to you someday ....